The Gads

An Emotional Surprise

2011-06-21T11:58:00.004-06:00

Mom with LeGrand and Marie Fletcher

Sunday, June 19, 2011, was Father's Day. After attending church and preparing a dinner for my husband and family, my Mom's husband, Harold, came to eat and visit with us. In hand, he brought two file folders of my mothers that contained things she had written that he "thought I might want to have." They were individually and simply titled: " LeGrand Fletcher" and "choices".

As I read them, I felt like my Mom had reached out of heaven and given me a gift! I don't believe that Harold bringing them to me that day and at this time in my life is a coincidence. It was a definite message from her to me. And I know that my Heavenly Father is watching out for me and trying to help me through a most difficult time. Thanks Mom! Thanks Heavenly Father! It was "an Emotional surprise! "

The fun thing about it, is that is what Mom titled her story about Elder Fletcher and I'd like to share her story with you all.

"An Emotional Surprise" by Eleanor Harnish Falzone

"It has been a really emotional week for me. Harold and I have been trying for about 6 months to find the missionary who baptized me. We went on the internet and tried several options....we had no luck. His name was LeGrand Fletcher and I could only remember that he had lived in Ogden before his mission. Anyway, I was about to check with the church to see if they had any records of a missionary in the Cheyenne area mission in 1955 and 1956. On Wednesday (May of 2003) last week I received a telephone call from LeGrand!!! I was speechless! He and his wife were at the MTC in Provo, about to head out to Nauvoo for the 6th mission. He said that in all the years he just had never had the opportunity to get back to Cheyenne and they were going to be coming thru on their way to Nauvoo. We invited them to stay here with us, and they accepted.

He called several times before they arrived early Friday morning, so we had a chance to get a little bit re-acquainted before they came. I set up Friday evening with my kids and those grandkids who could come, to meet with LeGrand and his wife Marie. Believe me, this was one of the most wonderful times I've had in my life! We talked for hours on end and my kids were just amazed at him and his wonderful wife.

LeGrand just cried and cried over the fact that I had stayed in the church even though Bud had given the missionaries a pretty bad time...Anyway, when LeGrand found that I had remained active for 47 years, all my kids had married in the Temple, we had two Bishops in the family- right here in Cheyenne - 4 grandsons on missions...he was so emotional. [For those of us who were there, you'll remember that the tears just streamed down LeGrand's face.] ...He says that when you are a 'young whippersnapper' of a missionary, you just always wonder if you made any difference in the lives of those you were involved with.

We had stayed in touch for about 5 or 6 years after he'd left here, but as often happens when our lives get busy with kids and life, and in our case - 17 moves in 15 years - we lost touch...

He had kept a truly marvelous Missionary journal and so was able to read to my children many of the entries on his visits with us in our home and the full detail of my baptism.

Yesterday, Mothers Day, during my Bishop son-in-laws talk, he surprised me by asking me to come up and repeat the story of my conversion and why, as a mother, I had needed and accepted the gospel. I was truly scared to death and hope that I was able to convey to the members of our Ward, the reason for my conversion. You see, when I became pregnant with Kathi, I began to panic. I prayed and prayed for the help to take on the life of a child, and to be able to raise it in the way in which He would approve. I really did need all the help I could get at that time. Kathi was just 2 weeks old when the Elders knocked on my door.


708 E. 19th Cheyenne Wyoming

His journal says I came to the door with this tiny, new infant and just opened it wide and asked them in. I was converted from the first discussion. I just KNEW that this was the answer to my prayers."

So, Thank you Mom for your steadfastness in living the gospel of Jesus Christ and to His church on this earth all the years of my life and your life....especially when it was not easy for you to do so. I'm sorry I didn't always appreciate or understand how difficult it was for you....but, I will continue to try and live as you would like me to, and to keep the faith. I sure want to be with you forever! Thank you for this little message from you, right in black and white, right at the time I needed it.

It's the smile that got me

2011-04-26T09:58:00.000-06:00

Lyle and I just went on a vacation to Maryland to visit friends and to also experience some of the DC area, as well as Philadelphia. However, with everything we did and saw, there are just a couple of pictures that captured the funnest times while there. The above picture is Lyle and Stan flying a kite. They had so much fun!

We took a drive up to Ocean City and Asseteague Island. Here we're fighting the wind trying to get back up to the Boardwalk at Ocean City. We were laughing so hard we could have, well, you know.....:)

We got to hang out with America's finest. Now that's something to smile about!

Valora and I were especially fond of these guys!

This was such a moment for Valora and I. We watched our men communicate, as only men know how. :) You know we were smilin' about it!

The "Rocky" stairs in Philadelphia. Oh, yeah, I'm smilin' about our run up to the top. WHATEVER!

This was indeed the best moment of the night we went to the dinner theatre to see "Happy Days".

We were not happy about the play, and left at intermission....but our husbands compliments sure made us smile!

This was taken in Union Station. We took the Subway to here, and then caught a tour bus to tour DC. It was raining the whole day we were there. BUMMER. But we're still smilin' cuz it was still a fun day!

In front of our Nations Capital....Freedom, now that's something to smile about!

And our friends, Stan and Valora were with us. That was the best part. Thanks Palmers!

The White house. We weren't able to get close because of security, but it was wonderful to see it.

Valora is pointing to the First Lady's garden. She wanted to get closer, but we had to make her behave.

It was raining, but we're still smilin!

Our next stop was Lethe and Tristan's house for dinner! We had so much fun! Lila kept us entertained!

TACO SALAD! Yum! I'm smilin' just thinking about it!

By far, even with all the fabulous things we did and saw, the place that made us smile the most was this:

The Washington DC temple

We loved our time in the temple, with our dear friends.

Thank you so much, Stan and Valora.

We'll be smiling a long time as we remember our time with YOU.

It's true and I'm thankful

2011-03-30T10:54:00.000-06:00

Today I finished the Book of Mormon. Again.

I don't know how many times I've read it. It has been many times....

but this time was a little different. Our new Bishop challenged us to read

the Book of Mormon at Christmas time and to be finished by Easter.

I decided to stop where I was already reading

in the Book of Mormon, and start over.

I always underline, make notes on the side of verses,

and by saying that, you have to know that my scriptures

are the kind the General Authorities talk about when they say,

"I can't read these!" Meaning, there is too much extra info in the way.

But I forget things, and want to remember them. It's the only way for me.

And so, I'll keeping making notes. But, this time I didn't do that.

I just read. I savored the moment of each chapter.

I only briefly wrote short phrases on a small bookmark.

This is what I wrote:

The Book of Mormon teaches us:

- How to prosper

- How to be happy

- How to be faithful and trust God even when it's hard

-How to keep hoping over our loved ones who are lost ("Are we not ALL beggars?")

-A Political science lesson on what works to preserve freedom and agency and what doesn't work.

- That Satan is real

- That Satan does not support his followers!

- That Prophets are real

- There is safety in following the Prophet and when we stop listening to him, we're headed for trouble

- The cycle of our own personal apostasy can be avoided if we INTENTIONALLY keep our covenants and promises

- The Lord's promises are sure.

- Personal righteousness is imperative

- We need to do our part. We can't just sit around and wait.

- Miracles have not ceased, for with God nothing is impossible. (I've prayed many times, "God, help my unbelief!")

- Jesus Christ is real. He is God's son. And He loves me.

The stories in the Book of Mormon save my life every single day.

They save me from myself and my own doubts and fears,

they save me from buying into the worlds ideas and God-less ways.

They strengthen me every day I open up it's pages and read, and feel it's power. Nothing that makes me feel that joyful can be untrue.

Thank you to all the prophets who wrote with painstaking effort to restore this history, these stories, this guide for being happy. This Book that saves my life.

I again took Moroni's challenge, to know if the Book of Mormon is true.

But, Before I could even ask, that familiar warm feeling started in my heart

and went through-out my whole body and soul.

It is true.

And I am thankful.

Bret's going to be 29!

2011-03-04T14:05:00.000-07:00

"I was young, happy and full of hope and expectations. We had wanted to have a baby ever since Kathi had married her handsome prince, Lyle. Things were wonderful! Things were right on track! Yet,4 years had come and gone with disappointment. No baby had made it's arrival yet. How could this be right? Something must be terribly wrong.

Dr.appointments were made. Tests were done. Advice was given. Nothing. Nothing was happening...

We decided to try and adopt, and started the tedious, long process of adoption papers. During this time, other changes were happening in our lives and we moved to Oklahoma for a change in employment. We'd have to start the adoption process all over again. This was again, another disappointment. I just didn't know if I could do this AGAIN.

Well, it must have been the water in Oklahoma, because at last, Kathi and Lyle Gadbury were expecting their first baby!

I suffered a little bit of morning sickness and while I was at work, at the United Bank of Norman, my boss would often find me eating saltine crackers to curb the nausea. It worked well. I also imagined that at 2 months pregnant, that I simply must wear maternity clothes! I was totally excited and wore them with pride, even though there was not even a little pooch to my belly!

I felt beautiful carrying this baby. It was a most happy time!

As the due date grew near, I experienced alot of false labor. Really hard contractions. Several weeks before the baby was due, I'd be up all night with contractions. It made for a long night on the couch!

Unlike today, back then, you did not find out the sex of the baby until it was born. So the excitement was even greater!

One evening as Lyle was reading in bed, while I was trying to sleep, I began to feel some VERY urgent contractions. But it was 2 weeks too soon, so I figured I was just in for another long night. But, the contractions started coming closer together, and stronger and harder and I knew this was more than an uncomfortable night on the couch. I knew it was time to go, and told Lyle that it was time. Lyle simply and calmly said, "No, it's not time yet." I persisted, and he equally resisted. Finally I convinced him to call the Dr. and the Dr. simply said, "Get to the hospital as soon as possible."

Nothing was ready yet. No bags...nothing. We hurriedly put together a night bag and off we went in our little Volkswagon rabbit. It was nearly 35 miles to Moore Oklahoma from where we lived out in the boonies of Oklahoma! The roads were very hilly all the way...and I felt every single one. I begged Lyle to slow down, because I felt like I was on a roller coaster, but he knew it was time to go fast. My water had broken in the car, the hills were causing me great grief....ahhhhhhh.....and I began to wonder if I was going to make it to the hospital at all before this baby came!

As we entered the town of Moore, and as we neared the hospital a policeman turned on his lights and siren to pull us over! Lyle of course, had been speeding! DUH! Lyle DID NOT pull over but kept driving to the hospital! I didn't want him to stop but worried that he'd be arrested and I'd be having this baby all alone!

Lyle pulls into the emergency entrance, gets out and says, "My wife is having a baby!" The policeman took one look at me and said, "Yes she is!"

A wheelchair was provided and up we went to labor and delivery.

The Doctor wasn't there yet. How is that possible? We had to drive 35 miles!

I was prepared for delivery and got to wear one of those glamourous hospital night gowns...you know the ones I'm talking about! oooohhh baby! Anyway, all I wanted to do was walk around....Laying on some table or bed was not an option. I was antsy and I couldn't sit or lie still. Things were very intense, and I just couldn't be still. So I walked. But they had to check things out and they told me I HAD to lay down, and now! Then someone comes and tells Lyle, "Sir you are going to have to go move your car." WHAT! This is a stupid time for anyone to be worrying about a car! I'm having a baby here, ya know!!!!!??????

Then the nurse proclaims, "Do NOT push until the Doctor gets here." How many women have heard that statement? And how much of that can you control?????

Things were getting very intense and tough. The contractions were hard and very, very close together. It was much too late for any kind of medication to ease pain. Lyle returned from moving the car, and I proceeded to dig my finger nails and fist into Lyle's hands with each contraction. (The Doctor had arrived now, so it was ok to push.) WHATEVER! With each contraction, my stronghold on Lyle was tighter and tighter. I never understood that until that moment. I'd heard about it, and I thought, 'why would you do that to your poor husband?' It became suddenly clear!

It took about 3-4 pushes for the baby to be born. First the head, the shoulders.....

"You have a beautiful baby boy" Dr. Dycus announced...and the sound of the baby crying...what a moment.

All I could think was, "a boy....A boy...it's really a boy....he's beautiful...he's perfect....he is mine..." as they laid him in my arms. This little human being, a creation of God, a creation of man and wife and their love... Tears fell freely.

(I would put pictures here, but back then, in the 'olden days' they didn't allow pictures to be taken....and it was barely allowed that the husband could be in the delivery room!

Words cannot begin to express the true joy a woman feels after the birth of a child. He was mine, he was beautiful, he was sweet and we'd made it together. This was a bond that could never be broken. It's beautiful."
(This account was taken from my journal)

Here is a picture of Bret and I. I couldn't believe I was a MOM!

Here is one of Lyle and I with Bret and Bret's great great grandmother Stroud.

And as a tribute to his 29th birthday, here are some of my favorite pictures of him.
Happy 29th Birthday Bret! I love you!

Bret and Bart in their footie pj's!

1984 family picture

Bret 5 years old. He hates this picture, but I love it!

At temple square in Salt Lake City.

Piano Recital.

Galveston Beach. It was COLD but the boys didn't care!

Scattin' ! He was in East High Singers

Bret and his cousin Willie muscle -ing up in front of BIG BOY.

Christmas with Mom and Dad

At the MTC with his baby brother Blake

After his mission in his favorite shirt

running the Boulder Bolder

Graduation from BYU-I

Dancin' with cousin Ellie at Will and Liz Harnish's wedding reception

His wedding day with his sweetheart, Niki Wirtz Gadbury

more pics from Orlando

2010-06-16T17:03:00.001-06:00

Help! The Trolley is coming!

Lyle was wearing shorts! Woo baby!

On a ride!

Just like old times, only better.

Harley Gads'

Harley Ma and Pa

Friends at Disney

Dancing downtown Disney

Closeup of the BIG GUY

Orlando Florida 2010

2010-06-15T08:47:00.000-06:00

Went to Orlando Florida to spend time with our friends, Stan and Valora!

Thank you for having us and spending quality time with us for 7 days!

You are wonderful and we love you!

I want to especially thank Valora for being brave and going on the AeroSmith Rock and Roll Rollercoaster with me!

We LOVED the pool!

Orlando Temple

Atlantic

Ocean

approx. 10 feet long,

Lyle and Valora were within

4 feet of this guy, who was

very accomodating for his

photo shoot.

Once upon a time....26 years ago...

2009-11-28T10:10:00.001-07:00

Bart Nathan Gadbury was born November 28, 1983

This is one of those stories that is full of joy, sadness, anxiousness, worry and fear. But most of all, it’s a story of love.

Our second child, wasn’t due until March 7, 1984. We were so excited to be expecting our second child. We wanted another child, and he was on the way! However, unknown to us, this child was one of those kids who wanted to be first, be great, and make an entrance!

In November of 1983, things with my pregnancy were progressing well. I was getting sufficiently plump and sassy. But, for some unknown reason, my water broke and I was only at 27 weeks. Normal delivery is at 40-42 weeks. Once your water breaks, you are pretty much committed to having the baby, but being young, I really did not comprehend the seriousness of it all. I just figured, “oh well, we’ll go to the hospital, and they’ll just stop the contractions and I’ll go home and everything will progress as usual.” I was so wrong.

Arriving at the hospital in Moore, I was told I would be staying. I was to remain bedfast. They thought I had a condition called, “Placenta Previa”.

Since my water had broken, they were afraid of an infection that would affect me and the baby. So, I was to be in bed. Period. End of discussion.

The whole point of me staying in bed was to try to keep the baby inside of me for as long as possible, so that his lungs could develop more. (I say ‘he’. We did not know if we were having a boy or girl at this point.)

It was very difficult to be away from Lyle and Bret. Bret himself was still just a baby. I also had fear that they would forget about me and not need me anymore. I cried a lot.

I made it for 8 days. Long days. Soap opera days. (There was absolutely nothing else on TV!) Bret was being taken care of by my Mom and also by Kelly Bittle. I knew he was in good hands. But I just wanted to be home!

I missed Thanksgiving that year. Everyone was at my Mom’s. Dave and his little family, Mom, Dad, Aunt Mary, Grandma Hogg, Grandma Stroud, Lyle and Bret. I felt a little lonely, but grateful that our baby was still staying put. I still had no idea what really lie ahead for the both of us.

The morning of the 8^th day, Monday November 28^th, things began to change and to change fast. I went into labor. I was scared. I had a fever, and the chance for infection was not good for me or the baby. But no one was really telling me anything. At about noon, my contractions were about 4 minutes apart. The next thing I knew, I was in an ambulance headed for Mercy Medical Center in Oklahoma City. This baby was coming! Ready or not. I heard the phrase, “They have a great NIC Unit. That will be the best place for this baby to be born.” My thought was, “What does that mean? Surely I’m not going to have this baby?!”

The ambulance ride was extremely bumpy. I remember distinctly that I was very uncomfortable, and I wanted it to stop! I’m pretty sure I conveyed that to them once or twice! I was in total misery and somewhat delirious because of the fever and infection.

Arriving at the hospital, I was taken and monitored very quickly. “Get her to X-Ray and Ultrasound, let’s verify placenta privea.”

In the meantime, they are trying to find Lyle. He’s at work on some remote site many many miles away! There were no cell phones back then. He would have to be physically found!

I became more and more alarmed, and as they started giving choices and options, I can really only remember that I just wanted it to be over.

And where was Lyle???? Because of the infection, I was becoming more and more ‘out of it.’ My temperature was 105 degrees!

They finally found Lyle. Thank Heavens. I was really really scared now and I needed him to be there! I prayed he would make it to the hospital in time.

The ultrasound showed no placenta privea, but the baby was breech, (feet first). This is not a good thing. This would mean I could not have him normal delivery and would have to have a C-section. Major surgery. This is not something I had planned! And I was tired and so exhausted and so frightened for my baby. Would he live? I had never considered that we were both in jeopardy. I was only worried about my baby.

Lyle made it to the hospital in time. He had to come from a long way away, but I really don’t remember much more from this point on.

My baby boy was born 4:53 p.m. that day. 2 lbs 2 oz. And 14 inches long.

I did not get to hold him, cuddle him, whisper, “I love you”. I remember nothing.

Meanwhile, while they are trying to get my infection under control, and to get our baby boy to the Neonatal unit, family were waiting in the waiting room.

My Mother told me she was so upset when they wheeled our baby boy past them in the waiting room, announcing, “Mr. Gadbury, you have a baby boy!”. Mom’s thinking was that here we have a premature baby, and you’re announcing the birth like it’s Christmas! Is he going to make it? What are his chances? He only weighs 2 lbs!

All were amazed.

I was very ill. I had to have a blood transfusion and be on powerful anti-biotics plus pain shots, I was in a fog for the next few days. I really didn’t even know I had had my baby!

Meanwhile, our son was doing well. The Doctor later explained to me that my “infection had actually been beneficial to the baby. It had helped him to be more strong. He was breathing on his own…he’d be in the hospital at least 10 weeks. He has a good chance to make it”.

Really! How grateful I was. I still did not really realize what lie ahead for us both.

I actually didn’t see Bart the day he was born. I don’t even know if it was the next day! But, When I saw him, I went into shock. I felt a loss, I cannot explain it. Is this really my son? Is he going to make it? He is so small, so helpless. And all these nurses and doctors are taking care of him! Not me! The weight of it all hit like a ton of bricks.

The Doctors came to see me. They asked, “are you going to nurse your baby?” I had no idea how to reply to this question. He could not nurse. He was too weak and too small, but I could supply the milk and they would feed him through a tube that would go straight to his tummy. (Gavauge)

Was I strong enough? Mentally, physically, emotionally to supply milk? I didn’t think so, and so I told them ‘no.’

I started on a medication that stops milk production. But after I became aware of ALL the details regarding Bart, I knew I NEEDED to do this for him. It was truly the only thing I COULD do for him. I couldn’t hold him, love him, or protect him. He was ill. His lungs had not developed enough, he had apnea ( he would suddenly stop breathing) and his heart duct had not closed at birth, which meant he would have to have surgery. (PDAL, Dec 7, 1983. note from journal: “Bart, your father and I have just come home from the hospital. You had heart surgery this morning at 7:00 a.m. and you’ve done well. It’s been hard for us to see you so little, to go through all of this. You are quite the fella. We love you.” ) I was absolutely helpless! I could not even hold him. That is a cruel and hard thing to bear when you’ve just had a baby. He needed ME, his MOM and they wouldn’t let me even hold him.

I had already started on the medication to stop milk production, but I decided I wanted to try to provide milk for him anyway. And this story is truly a miracle. I was not only able to provide milk for Bart, but I had AMPLE milk. Tons of it, and it was Good quality milk. Very rich. It was the only thing I could do for Bart and I was truly blessed to be able to do this ONE SOLITARY thing.

Every ounce of my being willed him to make it, to be strong. I loved him so. He needed me, and I wanted him to feel my love and my concern. How I wished I could care for him instead of the nurses and doctors! He needed them. He needed me. He could not have both.

Providing the milk was not fun, but I found it to be easy. This will embarrass Bart, but oh well. I had to rent an electric breast pump. I felt like Bessy the cow! I never had ANY trouble. It was truly a miracle. In fact, I had frozen so much of the milk, that when Bart finally did come home, I had milk for him for a very long time. I know in my heart that this is what made him strong, and able to grow and overcome his obstacles.

Bart dropped in weight to 1 lb 15 oz for a brief time. That was scary. He had to stay in the hospital for 3 months, the rest of his gestation period.

The nursery smelled funny. I hated that smell. There were lots of sick babies there. I remember a baby in an incubator next to Bart and that his mother could not provide milk for him. I asked if I could since I had so much, but for unclear reasons, they told me no. The baby died. I was very sad and it has affected me to this very day.

We were actually able to hold Bart when he was 3 weeks old. It seemed so unkind of them to not let us hold him previous to this, but I know that it had to be that way. I cannot explain in human terms how I felt that evening when we got to hold Bart for the first time. I was scared. I felt joy! I felt pure love. I felt peace. I felt deep gratitude. I didn’t want to give him back to the nurse. He made little gurgle noises. I loved holding him.

I have a picture of that moment. Not only in my scrapbook, but in my heart. He was so small. He had to have oxygen held up to his face. But he was finally mine!

He was so small, and had tubes and wires around him. But it was wonderful to finally hold my son! How young and naïve I was. How unprepared.

Bart was so small that Lyle’s wedding band fit over Bart’s hand. Diapers were too large so he laid under the lights in his bassinet/incubator naked. This was not how it was supposed to be!

Journal entry - 12/10/1983 “Your grandma and grandpa Harnish came up to see you tonight. I think it upset them to see all the wires and tubes you’ve got hooked up to you. You looked tired tonight.

I’m sure it is your way of recuperating from surgery. You’re a special boy, I know that for sure. Your father and I want you to come home with us soon.”

This was a difficult time. Not just because our baby was in a hospital 50 miles away from us. That was trial enough….

However:

· Bret was 2 years old and needed his mom.

· My grandma Hogg and Great Grandma Stroud were living with my parents and were of ill health, and would die while Bart was in the hospital

Journal entry: “Your grandma Hogg died this week. She was very ill. She never got to see you or hold you, but she loved you very much. She lit a candle for you almost every single day. It was her way of praying for you.” …”Grandma Stroud passed away just 10 days after grandma Hogg. It’s been very hard for me because I loved them very much. They were both great ladies. You’ve had quite a spell yourself. You were doing so well, and then decided to pull some breathing problems on us. Your father and grandpa Harnish gave you a blessing today. We leave it in the Lord’s hands. Please get better. We want you home with us. You’re too far away. I love you.”

· Lyle’s business was not doing well because of the economy crunch in Oklahoma.

· My brother was going through a divorce.

· My other brother had had some severe trials on his mission

· We were in the middle of building a house we would never live in

· My parents were having severe marital and financial problems

· And Bart was 50 miles away in Oklahoma City. Traveling daily was difficult.

I often wonder how in the world I did it. But I know how I did it. I relied on the Lord. He indeed carried me, and blessed our little son.

Early on, when I knew that this baby boy of ours was very ill, and had so much to overcome, I experienced a great peace. I knew that Bart would make it. I knew he would be whole. (So many preemies suffer their whole lives with blindness, deafness, learning disabilities, etc.)

But I knew he would come home to us. I thank God for that peace. It carried me through a most difficult time.

Journal entry: 10 weeks old: “ you were transferred to Norman Hospital so you could be closer to us. I can now come see you 2 or 3 times a day. It’s wonderful! Your apnea problem has not gone away, but I know of a surety that when your father gave you a blessing today, that it would be the end of this problem. The Spirit witnessed it to me, as I knew it when I requested the blessing. You need to be home with us. And you will be soon!”

And he did make it! Bart came home to us February 27^th. No more apnea. He did not even need a monitor when he came home. What a relief, what a blessing. We both had to adjust. Being away from each other had taken a toll, but he was home. It was where he belonged. He had won the fight, and what a fight it was. It was indeed the fight of his life.

Journal entry: “You are home!

oh, I love my man!

2009-11-02T09:56:00.000-07:00

I love my man!

Lyle, you are the

perfect one for me!

handsomeness!

2009-11-02T09:31:00.000-07:00

The Gadbury 'eyebrow' raise. Love it!

WE love our bubsy Bret!

oh yeah!

We really really love our Bubsy Bret!

Inexpressible joy

2009-11-02T09:23:00.000-07:00

As a parent, you pray from the day each child is born, that they will someday marry the right person, at the right time and in the right place. When this indeed happens, you are not at all prepared for the feelings of joy you feel. It is inexpressible! It is beyond words! Our facial expressions may say it best. We haven't stopped smiling, and neither has our hearts.

Congratulations Bret and Niki. We love you!

recent additions to the fam'

2009-09-12T09:06:00.000-06:00

Our sweet little 'great' nieces and nephew! We happen to think they are the cutest and sweetest EVER.

Londyn and Taylor

Boomer

Olivia

We have an engagement!

2009-07-23T13:09:00.000-06:00

Yes, we the Gadbury family, place of famine for feminine influence on our grown up sons, do, with GREAT pleasure, announce the engagement of our oldest son, Bret, to the beautiful Niki from Belgium....Belgium Wisconsin! They are getting married on October 16th! Isn't it just the best!????? We share it with the world! They are adorable together! Don't you agree?

Our 3 sons

2009-07-03T20:52:00.001-06:00

All our boys are home for the moment! I'm sure a few of them would rather be somewhere else...we know how hard it must be to have been on your own for awhile and have to end up at old mom and dad's. But we love having them here. One thing we've noticed for sure...our food bill has doubled!

Here's a pic of Lyle's truck and trailer all loaded up with Bret's stuff. We went out to St. Louis to help him move home. (Sweet jeep eh?)

Blake purchased a newer truck and probably has put a bazillion miles on it in a month or so going back and forth to Colorado for work. He loves his job! How lucky is that????

Last but not least, Bart is enjoying 'time off' and the highlight so far this summer has been a baseball game to see the Rockies play the Marlins....luckily his fav' team won! If you don't know who his fav team is, you can visit his blog! Or simply check out his shirt below!

Curtis, Bret, Lyle and Bart

Pictures of the heart

2009-05-17T16:22:00.000-06:00

The boys were all home the last two weekends. Yeah, I know, Blake lives in Cheyenne, and so does Bart at the moment, but Bret was here. Do you think I could get one stinkin' picture of all of us together? Nada! But I have pictures in my heart.

Like, on Mother's Day, when Lyle and I left to go to church, hoping that they'd all get up, get showered, and come to their old home ward on time. I can't even express the joy my heart felt when they all came in and sat down. That picture will indeed be in my heart forever!

Eating together again. How rare, how fun. I miss the little things that go away when your children do. We had roast, and hearing, "Mom, this is good," made me smile. Lyle bantered back and forth with the boys about 'stuff'...like he always does....and I think there was an attempt at a joke in there somewhere too....What a great picture all of us at the table that would have been.

Then, Bret and Bart took off for a week for a road trip. Utah, California, Oregon, and Idaho! Seeing them pack up and drive off in that car that wasn't even Bret's gave my heart a stir. What an adventure for them. What a worry for me. (am I EVER going to stop worrying about these grown up men of mine? don't count on it.) This is indeed a picture you would have liked to have seen! And I am pretty sure Bart has pictures of their trip that I haven't even seen yet!

Saturday was wash the vehicles day! All 6 of them! We talked, laughed, vacumed, scrubbed, cried, hugged. That is one great picture of one fun afternoon. Thanks guys for all pitching in!

Sunday was stake conference....how I enjoy sitting with my family! How I enjoy our friends making a big deal about seeing our boys. How my joy is full when I feel complete because they are with us.

Horse rides, dogs running in the yard, sitting out in the front, soaking up some sun and warmth, and showing off some pretty dang white legs! Whose are whitest, I'll never tell, but those are some nice pics AND legs! (whistle) Too bad there aren't any REAL pictures!

Bret packed up his car again today and headed back to St. Louis. Not such a good picture of me here. He wasn't even here long enough. How I hated seeing that old beat up car leave my drive way again. And now Bart is probably going to pack up and head back to Utah soon.
Can you see my wrinkled forehead and the tears welling up in my eyes in this picture?

Lyle give me a hug of comfort. Great pic here!

I wish I could show you this final picture I've taken of all of us standing outside today, in the sunshine, smiling, and joking and enjoying the day...I can't show you, but it's all right here in my heart.

A wedding!

2009-05-08T19:50:00.000-06:00

Well, it's not what you think! Nope, it's not one of the boys!

It was grandpa!

Harold and Marlene were married on Saturday May 2, 2009 in Boulder Colorado.

I have to be very honest and say that the idea of Harold getting married again was very tough for me. But seeing them together calmed me and I realized that Harold and Marlene are well-suited, and that they will be able to take care of one another in their golden years. Being alone is something neither of them wanted for themselves.

There were moments of sadness as I realized that he was moving on with his life... And, There were moments of understanding... It seemed that Harold was letting go of my Mom, but I now understand that the love they shared will always be there, just as the love he has for Margaret, his first wife will always be there.

Harold was very good to my Mom. He took good care of her, and protected her, and loved her. He took on her whole family, and became a grandpa to her grandchildren. He will always be the only grandpa our kids will ever remember.

I know he will always love my Mom, and us kids, and our children. How fortunate is the man who can be married 3 times in a lifetime to 3 VERY magnificent women. Most of us are lucky to have that happen once in a lifetime!

The music during the ceremony was especially sweet. Dave and Lyle did a fabulous job. How they remained calm I do not know!

As they sang, "A lady like you." (sung by Glen Campbell) I could not help but think of my dear mother and the Lady she was and will always be. (Happy Mother's Day Mom!)

"Here I am....just an ordinary man, my virtues are few.

And I'm amazed....every morning when I wake...with a lady like you.

You're all the good things God put on this earth...

And you're so much more than I deserve.

What did I ever do, to win a lady like you?

Look at me, I'm as common as can be...but you make me shine.

and look at you...you're a lady through and through, so gracious and kind.

And when you're sleeping softly by my side

I look at you and I'm mystified...

What did I ever do, to win a lady like you?

Heaven knows I'm less than perfect, yet I have found the very best.

But it's a mystery, how someone like me, was chosen to be blest With a Lady like you.

You're all the good things God put on this earth...and you're so much more than I deserve, and what did I ever do, to win a Lady like you?"

(See what I mean.....!)

Then...

Dave had a surprise up his sleeve when he sang during lunch, acapella, "They think we're too young." (sung by Nat King Cole) Tender and sweet for sure.

You know, when Mom married Harold all those years ago, it was hard. But my love for her, and not wanting her to be alone for the rest of her life, over-rode all my emotions. It wasn't always easy...but, most importantly, I will always be grateful for the kindess and love Harold showed to my Mother and that she was not alone. And for the very same reasons, I am sure Marlene's children are accepting this marriage for the same reasons, as are ALL of us in Harold's family trying to do the same. 2 people are not alone any more.

Maybe this post seems odd to you, and I suppose it IS pretty odd. But I sure have learned that life doesn't turn out much like we planned it.

mission impossible complete!

2009-04-22T09:34:00.001-06:00

Well, the new living room is pretty much done. Here are some pics. Let us know what you think! For those of you who've visited our home, you know that adding this space was much needed! Eating at our house was kind of hard with the table and counter so close together. But no more! We have space! And it only took us 15 years! Ha! Just kidding, but Lyle is the man! Thanks honey! thanks Bart! And a very special thanks to Mike Butterfield who laid the carpet with a very sore arm!

Did someone say it was SPRING?????

2009-04-04T17:52:00.000-06:00

Ok....so this really isn't our house...but it COULD be! We have been under a winter storm WARNING since last night and it doesn't look like it's going to get much better until tomorrow.

But, we've had a good day today staying warm and snug in the house, watching conference, and the guys, Bart and Lyle, have been laying tile in our new family room (the old garage/shop) I think they are doing a super job! Don't you!!!!!

Motherhood, second edition

2009-02-21T09:09:00.000-07:00

At my age, which is 53 (how in the world did THAT happen?) you start to think about your life up to this point. You start second guessing all the things you thought you did right early on as a Mom, and now wonder if it was right. A friend of mine just wrote me such a great email about how she has loved being a mother, but that she knows she made mistakes and hopes her children can forgive her and know that she did the very best she could with the information she had at the time. I couldn't say it any better than that. It not only brought me to thoughts of my own family and sons, but it brought me to thoughts of my own parents, and how UNforgiving I have been at times, and how UNkind I have been to them. They are gone now, and I cannot ask them to forgive me for my lack of respect and love for them. I wonder if they knew that I loved them? I often think about how much I thought they DIDN'T love me, but I am pretty sure in this deep reflection that is upon me today, that maybe they may have wondered if I was ever going to stop just thinking about myself and give them a passing thought, a gentle word, or a genuine thank you for all they did for me. I hope it's not too late. "Thanks Mom and Dad."

What did they do? Some pretty important stuff. Let's start with MOM:

Mom joined the LDS church alone. That took some bravery! She was a young mother whose husband was not interested in church. She struggled to get us kids to church each week as she sat alone in a pew with 3 little kids that she loved. Why else would she do that? She took care of us and we never were in need for anything. Ever. Mom didn't feel well most of the time, because of her MS, but she would still mow the grass, clean the house (which was immaculate) cook the meals. She took care of a dog that a friend gave me when I was 16. She didn't want a dog, but she took care of that dog because she loved ME. She later had to go to work because she became divorced and a single Mom. She didn't want us kids to go without one thing. and, We didn't. She's always been there to talk to, complain to, whine to, argue with and look to for advice. Of course, my mother was not perfect, but she was a good Mom, and she did the very best she could with what she knew at the time. I look back at the times I disappointed her and feel sad. Did I ever apologize? For anything? I can't remember.
I watched her leave this world in 2007, and I remember whispering to her, "I love you Mom. It's ok to go, we'll be ok. Fly." I hope she somehow knows how much I love her and miss her and how much I need her in my life. Forever.

Next is Dad. Dad was fun but dad expectations that were mostly unspoken. I just knew. Dad taught me to work, and to work hard and to be the best at whatever I did, even if it was just bagging groceries at the grocery store. I never wanted to disappoint him, but I did many times in my life. I suppose he would say, that he had disappointed me also. That's just how he was. He worked hard all his life. I never went without anything. He provided well. He joined the LDS church when I was senior in high school, and our family was later sealed in the temple. My family then had 3 years of pure joy. At least it was for me. I will always be grateful for that little glimpse of heaven before it all fell apart again. I had never been so happy. Dad wasn't perfect. He himself, thought he was far from it. But He was my Dad, and I will love him forever. I am so sad he chose to leave the world the way he did. Why couldn't I have done more for him? Why didn't I?

So, where are these thoughts taking me that will benefit me and my own now grown children?
I don't know other than to say, as my friend did, that I love being a Mom to my sons, that I would do anything for each of them, no matter the cost, and for those times when I have been wrong, which have been too many, I do apologize.
Even though the 'apron strings' have been un-tied as you've gone on to live your own lives, and you will someday have children of your own, just remember that YOUR mother loves you. And I've tried to do the very best I know how, and I'll keep trying.

Twue Wuv

2009-02-16T13:01:00.000-07:00

Even though I've been married for almost 32 years, I am not sure I could give a good definition of what "true love" is. But after spending a very nice weekend with my husband, I'd like to give it a shot, for those of you who would consider my opinion on the subject worth a read.

Twue Wuv, ahhemmmm, True Love is trusting in a person you hardly know, but think you know everything about them, and marrying them. It is looking at them, and wondering what in the world they see in you, and thanking God that they don't see everything you know about yourself that they would surely turn away from. It is forgiving them when they do stupid things, for surely they don't do those things to intentionally hurt you, because you know in your heart that they would never hurt you. It is doing things for them that they will take for granted, but you don't care, and you do them anyway because you love them and want to make them happy and comfortable. It is noticing when they are tired or sad or frustrated and praying you can say the very thing they need to hear at the very moment. It is changing your plans to accomodate what they need or want at the most inconvenient times and not regretting it for a single second. It is loving the way they drive, even though they can't, their off-key singing, and the funny shoes they wear, because you adore the whole of who they are, including the little things that bug you. It is trusting them with the money you have, your children, your posessions, your feelings and your secrets, knowing that they would never squander, hurt or sell anything that is important to you both. It is never having one thought that they could be unfaithful because they never would be. It is feeling safe and secure, and knowing they would always stick up for you even if you're wrong. It is allowing them to do things they enjoy, that you don't, and not feeling jealous or threatened by those things. It is listening when you don't want to, and hearing what you don't want to hear and being grateful that someone cares enough to try to help you truly see. It is wanting to be the best person you can be because you would never want to let them down, even though you do sometimes. It is forgiveness, unselfishness, compromise, work and joy. And it's worth it.

Motherhood

2009-02-10T14:03:00.000-07:00

Since everyone is posting pics of their kids, I thought I'd follow suit. Yeah, I'm not a 'new' Mom, but I'm a well seasoned Mom....well maybe just seasoned. But these are some cute, handsome, talented, make-a-mom proud sons!